Wednesday, 14 May 2014

Wednesday 14th May 2014

Today has been a horrid day and I can’t wait for it to be over.

After a spotty night’s sleep I was awoken by a phone call telling me that the psychiatrist’s appointment that I have been waiting for these last four weeks (and that was supposed to have been an emergency appointment to try to get access to some of the services that have been withdrawn from me) had been cancelled.  The consultant had phoned in sick, which I don’t have a problem with, but I was offered a slightly earlier appointment with a junior doctor on his team only to have that offer taken away from me within two hours.  The reason given was that the junior doctors aren’t allowed to see patients without a consultant being there which begs the question – why wasn’t there someone of consultant status ready to take over in such an emergency?

I had what I can only describe as an attack which was a mixture of a panic attack and an anxiety attack with a lot of anger thrown in.  I wept uncontrollably as I tried desperately to get an alternative to going to A&E which, in my heightened emotional state, I would have been unable to endure.  My anxiety around people in confined spaces would have been too much to handle in such a crowded environment and the prospect of sitting there for hours followed by God knows how long sitting in the room that they put mental health patients in alone, usually for long periods (based on previous experience), would have done me no favours either as there would be no distraction from my own thoughts.  At times of crisis, being alone with one’s own thoughts can be as distressing as being constantly hounded to tell your story of how you came to be in the crisis in the first place by a constant stream of doctors who fail to read your medical notes.

After a lot of panicked phone calls, getting me even more angry and worked up, I was given an appointment for next Tuesday after I impressed the urgent need to see the psychiatrist following an offer of a date in June (which would have meant that I would have had to wait almost two months for the emergency appointment I asked for during the period leading up to my aborted suicide attempt).

Despite my strained relationship with my parents, I felt compelled to call my mother to ask for her to be with me because I felt unsafe and she and my father arrived about an hour and a half later.  I needed someone to be with me and even my parents would do.

Dad went to the shops to get a jar of coffee after it transpired that there wasn’t any in the flat and, while he was gone, Mum told me that Dad’s nose problem was more serious than they had been letting on.  My Dad’s nose has been bleeding non-stop for about five months and, after two failed attempts at cauterisation, he had an operation to take a biopsy of the growth in his nose.  She didn’t tell me when they got the results but Mum said it has been diagnosed as a cancerous polypus that extends from the top of his nose, down the back and into the soft palate.

I may not have the best relationship with my parents but that news shook me and wasn’t exactly what I wanted to hear given my emotional state at the time but listening to Mum relaying the full story, seemingly in real time, took my mind off my own thoughts which is what I needed even if the content of the distraction was upsetting.

Luckily, Dad is being rushed through for an operation in the next couple of weeks so we won’t have long to wait for any news for long.  The cancer hasn’t spread to the brain or the bone so it looks as though, if they can excise the affected growth and some of the surrounding area, he might make a full recovery.

Since they finally took a look at Dad’s nose with a camera, he has been rushed through tests and exploratory operations so quickly his head is still spinning and my parents have both said that the care Dad has received on the NHS has been first class.  I wonder what would have happened if, as the Tories seem to want, there was no healthcare free at the point of delivery in the UK?

I am calmer now but it has taken all day to become so and I’m scared about what will happen between now and next Tuesday as I wait for my postponed appointment.  With life looking so bleak at the moment, it will take a miracle for me to find the strength to carry on.

Tuesday, 13 May 2014

The full uncut 'Kitty' Jones conversation

The full uncut Kitty Jones conversation

Sometimes one just has to publish the entire conversation one has with another person and let others judge the content.  So here, totally unedited by me, is the entire conversation I had with Sue ‘Kitty’ Jones which I was unable to finish as I was booted out of the group it was taking place in.

Ms Jones states that I was calling people names and being abusive and that’s why I was booted out the group.  I maintain that I did nothing of the sort.  All I can say is - judge for yourself who’s telling the truth here.

Please note:  This conversation was copied verbatim at approximately 03:45 on Tuesday 13th May 2014.

Glen Shaky Shakespeare We were on track for all of that in 2010 until the electorate opted for failure instead. Mainly at the behest of the BBC.

Sue Jones " Yes, Labour left a financial mess when they left office but it was not all their fault as the major global banking crisis too its toll as well. It would be nice if Labour held their hands up and accepted some responsibility but I believe we are passed the point of apportioning blame." Labour did not leave a mess, and the current government have been officially rebuked for this lie,

Sue Jones Labour’s social and economic policy was a success, and this is substantiated by the LSE’s definitive survey of the Blair-Brown years:

“There is clear evidence that public spending worked, contrary to popular belief.” Nor did Labour overspend. It inherited “a large deficit and high public sector debt”, with spending “at a historic low” – 14th out of 15 in the EU.

Labour’s spending increased, and money was invested in public services and social programs, and until the crash was still “unexceptional”, either by historic UK standards or international ones. Until 2007 “national debt levels were lower than when Labour took office”.

After years of neglect during the previous Conservative administration, Labour inherited a mess: public services in very poor state, shabby and squalid public buildings and unforgivably neglected human lives that formed a social deficit much more costly than any Treasury debt. Labour Ministers set about addressing the causes and devastating effects of poverty and social marginalisation. Both poverty and inequality had risen to levels unprecedented in post-war history.

This process accelerated during the 1980s. Unlike every other post-war decade, in which the benefits of economic growth had been shared across social groups, the economic gains of the 1980s disproportionately benefited the rich at the expense of the poor (Hills, 2004). Social inequality on such a gross level was not only the result of Thatcher’s policies, she celebrated it. She declared that inequality is essential to fostering “the spirit of envy” and hailed greed as a “valuable spur to economic activity”.

The “mess” that Thatcher left is verified by several longitudinal studies. Dr. Alex Scott-Samuel and colleagues from the Universities of Durham, West of Scotland, Glasgow and Edinburgh, sourced data from over 70 existing research papers, which concludes that as a result of unnecessary unemployment, welfare cuts and damaging housing policies, the former prime minister’s legacy “includes the unnecessary and unjust premature death of many British citizens, together with a substantial and continuing burden of suffering and loss of well-being.”

Sue Jones There can't be any consensus between the parties whilst the conservatives have adopted an authoritarian position, and certainly not whilst they continue to lie to the public, the extent of the lying is considerable, and it's constant -

Valen Cook You got that right, Glen.

Valen Cook To make things palatable for the ConDem recipients, some 'greasing of the wheels' has to be done. By giving all the parties some share of responsibility seemed the only way to get through to them.

Glen Shaky Shakespeare The Tories have no interest in putting things right for the country. They are earning far too much from the status quo.

Valen Cook I totally agree that Labour's strategy was working but we have to encourage all parties to come together, using some flannel might do the trick.

Sue Jones I wish I could see that happening

Valen Cook There has been consensus between the parties in the past - in the aftermath of the Second World War - but I think now is the time to dismantle the partisan system and have non-partisan leadership combining the best aspects of all the political ideologies which will leave no single part of the political spectrum wholly satisfied but may leave us with a much fairer system.

Valen Cook I totally agree, Glen. That's why we need to get rid of them.

Valen Cook We have to dream, Sue, or we will just lose all the will to fight for what's right.

Sue Jones I know that there was a postwar consensus, but since Thatcher, that's been impossible to sustain. The ideological positions of left and right are incommensurable

Sue Jones No Valen, we have to be realistic, face reality and deal with what is

Glen Shaky Shakespeare Tory policy is only meant to work for the richest at the expense of the poorest so any idea of political consensus is total nonsense. It is impossible. They are far too selfish. They have the wrong priorities. Our only hope is to get rid of them

Valen Cook That's why we have to get rid of the partisan system, Sue. You say face reality but all it takes is a leap of faith and the balls to carry it through.

Valen Cook Nothing is impossible, just implausible...until it's achieved. It is better to try and fail than to not try at all.

Sue Jones The problem with your idea is that the ideologies that policies are founded on are fundamentally grounded on very different beliefs about society and human nature. Furthermore , each party formulates policies which support a different section of society, with the tories believing that only the wealthy are virtuous and worthy of support, they build social hierarchies, whilst the left tends to support the vulnerable, and support equality and inclusion. These beliefs are irreconcilable

Sue Jones Many people took a leap of faith and voted lib dem, look where they landd

Glen Shaky Shakespeare I disagree. There is no point in even attempting this. Labour would be working in the interests of the country whilst the Tories would be fixated on the fortunes of millionaires. Non-starter.

Sue Jones Just said the same ^ lol, great minds

Valen Cook I'm not saying that I have all the answers, Sue, I'm not that arrogant. Does that mean that we can't have a proper dialogue to try to come up with a better solution? I voted Lib Dem in 2010 so I understand your reluctance to take a leap of faith if you did the same but that shouldn't stop us trying to change things for the better. Rid the system of party tribalism and you may have a shot at a better type of government. If we don't try then people like yourself and Glen have no reason to bitch about the system or the corrupt parties it creates.

Nathan Burns What you're asking for, a 'solution' in a time of crisis happened 6 years ago, when Gordon Brown was off trying to be grown up and save the world while David Cameron was just having a whinge at any attempt by the government to stop global financial armageddon. The real, pressing crisis has past. What we have now is a problem with the structures of our society and economy. Although these are arguably just as pressing as an instant crisis like the one experienced in 2008 they are not problems going to be solved by a coaltion. This is not WW2 and a matter of 'putting aside our differences', we need a blueprint for the future based on a cohesive vision on what we want our society to look like. You are not going to find that in a short term coalition arrangement.

Sue Jones I disagree and have argued elsewhere that we needto be more overtly partisan especially with much 'allthesame' propaganda around, Furthermore, there are so many coalition policies that can NOT and must not be endorsed or supported in any way. Think this through. The coalition are responsible for the deaths of over 11,000 sick and disabled people because of their policies.

Valen Cook You would be best looking at the other entries on my blog for my ideas on what could be done for a better way forward.

Sue Jones The only way forward is a labour vote

Sue Jones And a clear opposition to coalition policy

Valen Cook Sue, every ideology has a good point. It is finding those good points and combining them. If you truly believe that only a Labour vote is the way forward then you are sadly misguided because Labour have not got the clear opposition policy you're looking for.

Sue Jones You claim tory ideology has some good points, and then you have the cheek to call ME 'sadly misguided'?

Glen Shaky Shakespeare The problems our country faces come exclusively from the Tories. They can't be worked with, that much is clear, they have absolutely no interest whatsoever in doing what's right for the country. They still follow that fabled 'trickle down economics' theory. They believe in that wholeheartedly whilst there is no evidence to support the theory. In contrast Gordon Brown had engineered a strong recovery that would have left all worries long behind us. It is I am afraid an impossible concept.

Glen Shaky Shakespeare That was just 2011 Sue. They stopped counting after that.

Sue Jones There are so many coalition policies that can NOT and must not be endorsed or supported in any way. Think this through. The coalition are responsible for the deaths of over 11,000 sick and disabled people because of their policies. Human rights violitions, oppressive policies, and you think these are positive ?

Valen Cook None of the political parties in the UK are worth anything. We need to dismantle the corrupt system and create a new way forward. Anything else is just postponing another UK Apocalypse like the one we have now because all we'll get is a government that wings from Left to Right and back again ad infinitum. Stagnation is all this current system offers because what good one administration does the other undoes and vice versa.

Sue Jones Yes, i know Glen, and I am terrified at the thought of what they are withholding from the public

Valen Cook You are looking at partisan ideology and not the pure ideology on which it is supposed to be based. Everything you have used as evidence to remain with the status quo is to do with partisan politics, not pure ideology.

Sue Jones You may do better to inform yourself regarding facts and policies before dismissing all political parties Valen. You clearly haven't done that

Sue Jones Besides that, we have the system that we have, and you certainly won't change that with a tory government in office.

Glen Shaky Shakespeare You are missing the main point Valen. The Tories have never ever done anything positive for the country. People need to learn not to vote Tory. They have to try thinking for themselves. The Tories own the UK media so you are never going to get fair coverage. Even the BBC decided to overtly campaign for them in 2010. Personal responsibility is the key and I mean responsibility at the ballot box.

Sue Jones Valen proposes that parties merge and 'work together' whilst criticising them for being 'allthesame'. Coz, like, THAT'S coherent...not

Sue Jones Some 'debates' just aren't worth having

Glen Shaky Shakespeare I don't see anybody in the Tory party Labour could possibly work with now. Even if there once was Cameron has totally screwed that now.

Please note:  There is a typographical error on my response made at 22:00 – the word ‘wing’ should read ‘swing’.  I didn’t alter it in the body of the text because I might have been accused of altering what I said but, as you can see from the conversation above, the only editing has been done by Ms Jones on her entries.

After being booted out of the group, I sent Ms Jones a private message but she continued in much the same vein as the conversation until she threw a hissy fit and prevented me from replying although she keeps feeling the need to comment on my diary entry dated Saturday 10th May on this very blog, hence this posting to put the record straight.